September 15, 2014 – Monologue Jokes
1. Walt Disney World announced Friday that construction has begun on a new Epcot attraction based on the animated hit “Frozen.” Because apparently the “it” in “Let It Go” is your money. 2. Sarah Palin...
View ArticleApril 29, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. According to a new survey, 1 out of 4 Americans didn’t exercise at all last year. And, according to a survey I conducted with my eyes, the remaining 3 out of 4 Americans are liars. 2. According to...
View ArticleMay 1, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. The California ALCU launched a mobile app on Thursday that will let bystanders record cell phone videos of police misconduct and then send the footage to the organization’s computer server. And, in...
View ArticleJune 11, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Wednesday, J. Crew laid-off roughly 10% of its workforce. But, on the plus-side, those employees definitely have the shorts to go with their pink slips. 2. Michelle Kwan, the two-time Olympic...
View ArticleDecember 14, 2015 – Monologue Jokes
1. According to a new study, the majority of new cases of STDs are occurring in the South. Scientists discovered this when they noticed that a large percentage of people who live in Alabama knew how to...
View ArticleJanuary 26, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. On Monday, Ben Cohen, one half of Ben & Jerry’s, endorsed Bernie Sanders for president by unveiling a new ice cream flavor called “Bernie’s Yearning.” It is expected to sell better than “Trumps...
View ArticleApril 1, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. Five top players for the World Cup champion U.S. women’s soccer team have filed a federal wage discrimination complaint claiming they are paid less than male players even though they generate more...
View ArticleOctober 5, 2016 – Monologue Jokes
1. Donald Trump supporters say the Republican presidential candidate declaring almost a billion dollar loss allowing him to not pay taxes for years makes him “a genius.” “So I guess I’ll just be over...
View ArticleFebruary 3, 2020 – Monologue Jokes
1. President Trump said on Monday the United States and China were in close contact regarding the newly identified coronavirus outbreak. “Close contact? Be careful, you might contract something,” said...
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